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How Your Money Psychology Influences Your Relationships

Listen to this series via our Date Smart podcast. Episodes are released weekly!

In this series, we’ll be exploring how our money psychology affects our dating lives and relationships.

Did you know that 57% of divorced couples cite money problems as the primary reason for divorce and 40% of couples don’t even talk about money before marriage? It turns out that most arguments around money have nothing to do with the numbers themselves and everything to do with the psychology behind money, that is, how you were raised to think about money. We all have a legacy about money — a story that is handed down from generation to generation about what money has meant to our family — and we bring those beliefs and feelings about money into our relationships. As John Gottman from the Gottman Institute puts it, “When two people with two separate histories with money get together, they must face the challenge of merging those two histories—or deal with the consequences of not addressing them. “

We all have a sort of “money blueprint” imprinted on us from an early age - whether from our parents or society - and we go through life clutching on to these beliefs so tightly without questioning whether or not these beliefs are serving us. And when we enter into a relationship, rather than talk about our beliefs and reach mutual understanding, we let conflicting beliefs run a wedge between us without understanding the root cause. 

Like I mentioned before, most people believe money arguments have to do with the actual numbers, ie: “If we just earned more money, then we wouldn’t fight about buying organic produce or staying in a 4-star hotel," but that’s almost never the case. The root cause of money problems almost always starts at a psychological level. And that’s what we’re exploring in this series. We’ll discover our own money mindset, how to explore your date or partner’s money mindset, and how to reconcile opposing perspectives around money so you can get on the same page and become co-creators of your lives. 

Your money blueprint influences everything you do, from whether you splurge on the organic blueberries at Whole Foods to the kind of partner you attract into your life and everything in between. Mastering your dating life is easier than you think –– it’s just a matter of science and a little know-how.

Click the link to jump to a section:

CHAPTER 1: My Personal Story With Money

CHAPTER 2: What Is Your Money Mindset & How Does It Affect Your Dating Life?

CHAPTER 3: How To Understand Your Partner's Money Mindset

CHAPTER 4: How To Reconcile Opposing Money Mindsets With Your Partner

CHAPTER 5: Joint Finances & Prenups

CHAPTER 6: Money Dates & Couple Goals

CHAPTER 7: Full Interview With Rebel Finance School Founders Alan & Katie Donegan

HOMEWORK: Questions & Exercises

Listen to this series via the Date Smart podcast. Episodes are released weekly!

The Date Smart podcast is hosted by Ambiance Matchmaking’s cofounder Taylor Wade. Twenty years ago, Taylor cofounded Ambiance Matchmaking, an exclusive matchmaking agency that has helped over 100,000 singles master their dating lives. In this podcast, she shares the same tactics and techniques with you. Mastering your dating life is easier than you think –– it’s just a matter of science and a little know-how.

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Taylor Wade

Taylor is one of the founders of Ambiance Matchmaking. She now dedicates her time to curating content for our community through her podcast and blog. Writing and podcasting is the art of great story-telling. As a relationship writer and editor, she has always sought to capture the reality of the dating experience, full of drama, friction, and joy. The best mind is an open mind, so she specializes in asking questions and approaching a story without preconceptions.

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