Genuine Passion vs. Unearned Passion
The real reason people get hurt in their dating lives is by overvaluing initial passion and undervaluing investment in the relationship.
Initial passion can be described as "unearned passion" because both people entering into the relationship do not know everything about each other yet. They are passionate about each other because of what the other person appears to be, not who they really are.
It's easy to get caught up in the initial passionate stage of a relationship. There are intense feelings of pleasure pouring out of you. There is dopamine running through your veins.
However, initial passion is overrated. It wanes. It fades. It flees.
“Genuine passion” is what holds the relationship together for the long-haul. Initial passion can turn into genuine passion, but only time will tell if both partners are willing to make the investment.
The word passion derives from the late Latin word passio, meaning suffering.
A relationship is full of ups and downs. It's not just something that you benefit from, it's something that you suffer for.
You suffer and endure through these ebbs-and-flows because you know the overall fulfillment you receive from the relationship is worth it. The benefits outweigh the negatives.
Initial passion is overrated, however, genuine passion is priceless.
Instead of overvaluing initial passion, embrace the possibility it brings. When that possibility finally delivers genuine passion and subsequently, mature love, never take for granted all of the joy it brings.